Ch-ch-ch-changes...

Some of you might have noticed that my right sidebar thingy is different. My masters degree timeline is gone.

This is true.

A few months ago, I decided not to continue pursuing my MLS degree.

Why?
I wasn't enjoying it THAT much, especially to have it drag out for 3 or 4 more years. (Especially when we'll probably be starting a family in the next few years--I couldn't see myself pregnant/having a newborn, working AND going to school at night) The money I would be spending on the degree wouldn't pay off, salary-wise, for a LONG time. Meaning: me starting out as a librarian in 3 or 4 years would be equal to what I might be making HERE at current job in 3 to 4 years without a masters. I also enjoy my free time! Especially now with the house, and DH's weird work schedule, things would never be done. And I'd never be home.

Schooool's aaaaalllll-most o-ver!

*sung to the tune of "School's out for summer"*

Ahem, yeah, so my summer class is almost through. My group and I (heh, just the two of us now that I put that crazy b*tch in her place) are working on our final project which is due tonight, and then the final on August 6 or 7. Since it's online, you choose when you want to take it.

I will be glad to be done with the class, especially the online stuff. It wouldn't have been that big of a deal to go to school. I didn't like the amount of work, and not getting to know my classmates better. You miss something when it's online. I'm sure I'll see these people later on in the program. I did NOT enjoy the group project. I don't enjoy it right now, with my one group member taking her sweet time doing her part, so we can splice it together and post to the board. I'm sitting around, waiting, and waiting...

We have 5 assignments, each worth 20 points, adding up to 100. I don't like this type of grading since I have to do more math to figure out where I stand. (and yes, this is why I've always worked with books and am going to library school, lol)

Assignment 1 = 15
Assignment 2 = 20
Group project =
Final =
Participation = 20 (I'm assuming. I'm pretty chatty on the class message board)

So far, that's a 92. Phew. If I get 20's on the other two projects, the highest grade I can get is a 95. I'd like to keep my A track record, but I won't die if I get a B or B+. I just want to pass so I can get into the program.

Group projects

I really thought that when I was in grad school (remember this is time #3, people) group projects would be easier.

GirlWednesday FAIL.

I'm not going to go into specifics because it would be too lengthy and upsetting...but someone dropped the ball, and basically left the game without saying anything, only to try and re-enter the game in the fourth quarter.

It was so bad, I HAD TO GET THE PROFESSOR INVOLVED. I am not like that, folks. I don't tattle. I don't ask for help. Fortunately he was good about it all and came up with a strategy. But then this person decided to get off the bench and play again.

GROW UP PEOPLE!!!!!! Leave this garbage in ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.

School news

Some of you might have noticed the new list on the right hand side...I needed to put my school to-do list in plain sight, because I was getting a bit overwhelmed and afraid I might forget something.

I have to take a semester off. The MLS program that I'm applying to has two dates for admissions--Sept 1 and March 1. I won't make the Sept 1 deadline, sadly. If I didn't take the summer course I'm in right now, I would have made it. I need to take the GRE again, and since it's been almost 10 years since I last took it (YIKES!) I really need to study that stuff. Especially since there's a new section that wasn't there the last time...I can't do that in a few weeks (I'd need to take it by mid-August to ensure that the scores are reported to the school in time.

This summer has suddenly become busy with a few bridal showers and weddings to attend, so that hampers things. Work is also super busy, so between working, socializing, and wrapping up this summer class, I think I have my hands full!

The plan is to use the fall to get my academic "shizz" together--ask for recommendations, study for the GRE, etc (you can see my progress on the to-do list to your right) and I'll apply for the March 1 deadline. I'll take a class in the spring while I await my decision and go from there...

Why not take one in the fall while I'm working on my other stuff? Ha, good question. The MLS program does not allow non-matriculated students to take more than 9 credits (3 classes) before they are accepted, so that definitely throws a wrench into my progress through the program. If I take one in the fall while working on my other stuff, I'll have to take the spring off and then I wouldn't be doing anything but waiting, so I figured it was better to spread myself out.

While I'm not really pleased that I dropped the ball and lost track of time, it will be OK. A very good friend of mine had to do the same thing when she was in the program--for a different reason, and then she later doubled up on classes to finish quicker. Of course my grand plan is after DH finds a job and I'm accepted, to find a part time library job, quit my full time job and take more classes. But we'll see how that goes, especially these days.

Thanks A+ and Ms. M!

Your comments on my last school post helped immensely. I also took some quiet time one morning and just walked myself through everything the professor wanted. I think I'm in the midst of the swing of things now. At least I hope so.

Now to work on what I need to APPLY to the program...ugh.

Has anyone ever taken an online class?

Can you help me? How do you keep it all together, the readings, the assignments, the postings?

This professor wants us to join all of these list serves, read posts, post things to our Blackboard page for the class AND to our Yahoo group.

I know this is grad school, but this is ridiculous. I've been in grad school 2 other times, and it's never been like this. I don't know how I can work full time and just take ONE class!

Real quick, something about school

So I'm taking an online class this summer. Supposed to start June 1. I kept logging in to the school's site that said "My Courses" (as there was a discussion board, places to post files and messages etc). I thought that was the place where we'd be "having" our class.

Yesterday, while checking my school email, I see the link to Blackboard which I've seen every time I log into school email, and on a hunch I decide to click it. Good thing I did! THAT is where my class is being "held." AND we had an assignment due by today! Just a quick introduction of ourselves, so I did that and was done. Also ordered my book from Amazon to come Monday (yay $17 for shipping) because we have a reading/discussing assignment due soon.

Shaking my head...

Almost FAIL. Diverted FAIL. Not quite WIN though.

My paper is done!!!

Finally. One more class (the final exam) and then I'm out of school until my summer course starts in June.

Thank you Jesus.

I think I did well on my paper...I'm a good writer. I'm not saying this because I *think* I am, I'm saying this because I have been told I am. So I am. Ha.

Let me step off my high horse for a sec... ;-)

Short school rant

I'm writing a paper that's due at the end of the month. Topic: social networking used to market the library. Pretty good topic, especially in today's world, right? Sure.

I'm having a bear of a time because 1) I haven't written a research paper in forever, 2) there is SO much stuff out there about this topic, and I'm not sure what to weed out, and 3) I feel like a bumbling fool, just reading and making notes...and not sure if I'm even on the right track for this paper.

Blech.

I'm sure all will be fine in the end, but man, I hate not knowing if I'm doing the right thing. I hate that "free fall" between getting the assignment and getting your grade. It's all up in the air.


Okay, off to get ready for Mass...DH and I are going early to do confession today. I haven't been in a few weeks, and before then, I hadn't been since before the wedding! I used to not like confession, and actually didn't go for years...but I think when you have a priest who doesn't make you feel like a jerk, it's better.

Stop the presses! A non-hair post.

I am a huge procrastinator, and along with this, I am often late. You'd think, being almost 30 years old, I'd have learned how to deal with this better, to be more organized, to plan ahead, etc.

Nope.

[I do have to point out that I was never the queen of all-nighters. That title goes to my college roomie, K. She would be up all night, in our dining room with her laptop and a stack of books, writing research papers. I did plan somewhat ahead for those, partly because I had a desktop computer, and it would not have been fair to my immediate roomie, B.]

When it comes to work stuff, I have gotten somewhat better, by plotting out my next week on Friday afternoons, sending out a lot of emails for collaborative tasks, working on things in small amounts each day. That's good, except when I plan ahead SO much that we have plenty of time to submit things, and OTHER PEOPLE decide to change up my stuff up until the last minute. (Another post for another day *sigh*)

When it comes to my grad school assignments, I am infamous for doing things the night before they are due. I think this comes from being out of the school grind for so long, and having other things to do in my life! This weekend, I set off for my town's library to work on an annotated bibliography for a paper that I have to write. The paper's not due until the end of the semester (next month!) but the professor wants to see our annotated bibliography first. Fine.

I'd been searching for a few days, on and off, and not finding much while looking at home, probably because of the mass amount of distractions in our home. So Sunday afternoon, after Mass and errands, I went to the library. I'm plugging along, loving the fact that I can access school's databases in the "comfort" of my own library (it's only 1.8 miles from my house vs. the 10+ to school), finding a ton of things to support my thesis, saving the sources, etc.

I then decide to plot out the rest of my week, before I go to class on Wednesday, so that I'll have time to do the assigned reading and write up my annotated bibliography. I pull out the syllabus just to see which chapters in our books I'll need to read.

And then I see it. The due date for this annotated bibliography.

It's NEXT week--April 8. Not THIS week--April 1.

I'm actually ahead on something. I started laughing out loud, in the "quiet" area of the library. I couldn't help it.

Of course, I'm not really done. I still have to read through some of these sources, and write the actual annotated bibliography, but I couldn't get over the fact that I had gotten the dates wrong, and had a jump start on my paper! I'll still have this coming weekend to get my stuff together. I wouldn't mind starting the actual writing early, as it'll take me awhile to write it and get it exactly how I want it.

I'm still shaking my head...

It's LIBRARY!

One of my biggest pet peeves is when people say "liberry" instead of "library." Little children are excluded, as long as they grow up and say it correctly ;-) Those with speech impediments are also excluded. (I'm really not a meanie, I swear.)

Anyway, I have two cases in point which REALLY REALLY bother me.

I'm not talking about a casual overheard conversation in the grocery store. I'm talking about two people who work pretty closely with libraries.

One, a sales rep at work, whose sole job is selling our stuff TO libraries, always says it "liberry." He'll be on the phone with a "liberrian" talking this person up about our latest products, and then I'll hear the dreaded L word. I sit near him, so I can hear him clear as a bell. I shudder EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. he does it. Who knows what the "liberrians" think of him, when he's visiting them in their "liberries." You don't hear car salesmen saying "Niss-in" instead of Nee-SAHN."

The other, is a woman in my library school class. She works in a school library (I think it's elementary) and I cringe every time she opens her mouth in class. "Liberry" this, "liberry" that. For God's sake, woman! You are teaching YOUNG MINDS. Please do not corrupt them into thinking that this is the right way to say the place where the books are kept. I'm surprised the professor hasn't said something yet. I would if I were her (the prof).

100th post--big news!

I think this news is fitting for the 100th post here.

OK READERS, I am going back to school!!!!!! The following is from a message board that I belong to...

I've been feeling really stuck and bored with life lately, as some of you might have noticed.

My therapist and I made major headway the other night about why I feel like this...and finally she said, "Look, I have to say this, I might be biased, but..." and then she suggested that I'm not stimulated enough, I'd do better in an intellectual/academic environment, etc. That I don't really have a career, just jobs, and my dissatisfaction with that is why I keep wanting to "run away" from my life and just stay home and not work. So then I said to her "Okay, I have to come out with this...but I keep thinking about library school."

I had been thinking about it for years, since senior year of college--and just kept pushing it away, esp. after being IN a library...but I keep going back to it...and with all of my book-related jobs...why not make it my career and do something REAL and more stimulating and intellectual than what I am doing now? (and, um, make more money, lol) I just needed to admit it to myself.

I feel SO much better, as if I have figured out my purpose/direction. I think that's what was missing--I didn't have anything to look forward to or think about. And now I do No more stuck feeling...I just have to move forward with my stuff. It makes me VERY excited thinking about it. It just all came together.

When I told DH after my appointment, he was like TOLD YOU SO! For years, he's been saying how I should go back to school, be a librarian, etc.

So, at the end of this month, I will start my very first library class, and go one class a semester until I'm accepted (because the school limits how many non-matriculated classes you can take) and then try and finish the degree as fast as I can. Over the summer, I will take the GRE, get all my application stuff together, etc.

Part of me was feeling like I needed to have my life figured out, and fast, esp. before we have kids. Well, we're not having kids for a few more years, so I can still do school, and there was a part of me who felt that I had to be like MY mom, and be a SAHM. I know a lot of people who had working parents and they turned out all right, no delinquents or anything, lol. I also know mothers who went back to school after having kids, too. There's no perfect life. There's an ideal, but nothing's perfect. So I'm just gonna roll with it and see what happens.

School

I was reading a blog over here the other day, and actually commented on one of the posts about how I didn't finish two masters degrees.

Ooops.

That led me to do some thinking about the degrees.

Why I started them. Why I didn't finish them.

When I started them, I had good intentions of finishing them. Perhaps I even had delusions of grandeur of doing something great with them. What happened? Why didn't I finish? I don't know.

It's a little embarrassing, but I try not to think about it too much--the fact that I didn't finish. I know I'm smart enough to get into graduate school. The problem is...I'm not smart enough to know what I want to do once I get there!

I love learning. I hate that you have to pay for it, most of the time...unless you teach yo' self. Which actually isn't a bad idea...I mean, kids get homeschooled every day. If I wanted to learn something...and it was easy to read up on it or study it, then it couldn't be too hard, right? If I wanted to, I don't know, take up WELDING, for instance, then yeah, I'd need to study with someone...someone who could teach me how to do it safely, lol. Knowing me, I'd start a fire.

Anyway, I started two grad programs.

Program the first--a masters in American Studies. I majored in AMS in college and LOOOVED it. It was a great major, and left a lot of my friends jealous due to the types of classes I took. Classes like Food and American Culture. Women and the American Experience. A class about the neighborhood in which my college was located.

Senior year of college, I was pretty much set on NOT working after graduation. I wanted to keep learning about AMS, go to grad school, and become a professor. I wanted to inspire and share knowledge with people, much like my professors had done for me. So I got accepted by one school, even though I'd applied to a ton. I moved to that city and did one semester. I didn't like the courses--they weren't what I'd though they'd be. There was a ton of reading and I didn't know how to get all of it done. I wasn't doing well on my papers. I also didn't know what I'd do when I finished. I just wasn't feeling it. Not to mention, I missed my friends, wasn't making any in this new area, etc.

I left after that semester.

Program the second--a masters in Health Care Administration. After I'd left the first program, moved home and gotten my first "real" job, one of my former undergrad professors hired me to work with him as a research assistant on a book he was writing about the American health care system. I developed a passion for learning everything I could about this subject. I wanted to study about it more. So I thought the best thing would be to go to school for it.

I found a local university that had the degree, and started taking classes. While I did well in them and liked them very much, I had met my now-husband and found that he was having trouble getting work in his field, even though he'd received a masters degree from the same university I was now attending. I realized that I needed some practical experience in the field if I was to get a masters and expect a job. Maybe I didn't look very hard, maybe I was lazy, but I had a hard time finding a job that would hire someone transitioning fields.

So I gave up school again. This time around, DH was recovering from the bad accident that almost killed him, I was having problems at my job (and wanted to quit), so those were things that definitely influenced me on why I quit.

Why am I posting about this...now? I don't know, the whole jury duty thing really stirred up something inside of me. I realized that I don't really DO anything...I work, but I'm not really into it. I want to have a purpose. That sounds so stupid in print, but it's how I feel. I don't really have any interests, any thing that drives me.

Then I feel stuck because I can't just pick up and move, or quit my job to try something different. I've always had something (be it a person or a reason or a fear) that kept me back. Not all of these somethings are bad or unwanted...they just shape your life differently...so that you can't just do what you want.