A return to something familiar

I've posted about this before, about feeling like I don't belong or don't have a place.

I'm having that feeling at work again. For awhile I thought things were going well...but I still feel like I don't belong, really. I know, it's weird, especially because it's just WORK, but when you see other people talking about what they do outside of work (and you know you weren't included), it's hard not to feel slighted.

I probably feel more slighted than most because I don't have many local friends. Not that work has to be a direct channel for socialization, but we all know it helps. The people I'm friendly with are all in their early to mid 20s and are single, not really tied down--they are one group. There are other people with whom I'm friendly, a little older, married with kids, all male--they make another group. I don't fit in with either...I'm really trying not to let this bother me, but it does.

I think I'm feeling this way partially because of this weekend. My college friend K got married. Besides her shower last month, I hadn't seen her since MY wedding almost 2 years ago. Same with another friend, A. I really have no idea what's going on in their lives. It makes me wonder why people don't want to keep in touch. Are we really so busy? Is it me? Is it them? Who knows.

song poem

Stolen from illini_girl's blog!

You put your itunes of shuffle and write the first word of every song for 20 songs. . . and the 21st song’s first line becomes your title.

Here it is. . .let's hope my weird music tastes didn't screw this up too much. We had some Go-Go's, Dave Matthews, Stevie Nicks, REM, Peter Gabriel, Eric Clapton, Ben Folds...

Title: In a white room with black curtains in the station

Can't seem to get my mind off of you

Satellite

I have finally found a way to live just like I've never lived before

You threw away the ballast and you rowed your boat ashore

Now the radio studders, snaps to life

You could be my silver spring blue green colors flashing

Colour me your colour, baby

Something is about to give


You've got your ball

Hey! Hey! Hey!

Get away from me just get away from me

Loving you isn't the right thing to do


Swaying room as the music starts

I'm on my way I'm making it

And summer became fall

Pangs of silence from the room upstairs

Why I love CVS

If you're in a part of the country that doesn't have CVS, I'm sorry :-(

We needed a few things that you can get pretty much anywhere--laundry detergent, bar soap, paper plates, napkins. I really don't like Walmart and go there only as a last resort, even though it's 5 mins from my house, but Target is like 25 mins away, no joke. I also don't like buying things like that at the grocery store, because they jack up the prices on those things and I hate the grocery store to begin with. (One perk of an unemployed husband--he does the food shopping during the week day!)

As many of you probably know, years ago, CVS came out with those ExtraCare cards, giving you $$ off on purchases and money back in the form of coupons. I'd recently got a coupon for $10 off a $50 purchase, and an $8 coupon. Knowing that I needed those things mentioned above, I figured I'd get them at CVS (where they might be a little pricier than Target and probably less selection) but with the coupons, I'd probably come out OK. Plus CVS is also 5 mins from my house, so I'd save in gas, too. And I needed to pick up my RX for my allergy meds.

I grabbed my regular coupon folder before I left, and it's a good thing I did. Here's what happened when I went to CVS...

Laundry detergent--yeah, not as many varieties as Target, but we usually use Tide or Arm & Hammer. Also because we have to hike our stuff down to our complex's laundry room, we buy small bottles. I know, it's more money that way, but laundry is heavy enough! Tide was on sale for $5.99 (saving $3 from the usual price), plus I had a $1 off coupon for any sized Tide. Score!

Grabbed the paper plates and napkins--both were store brand, so pretty cheap. Got the soap, realized we also needed toothpaste. had a $1 off coupon for that too. Wasn't sure if I had enough to get me to the $50 mark (and I know, those coupons make you spend more so you think you're saving) so I grabbed a box of tissues, also store brand. I was on my way to the pharmacy counter, and walked by the contact solution that I use. It was $2.50 off for the twin pack, and I also had a soon-to-expire $3 off coupon. Grabbed that too!

Here's what my receipt ended up looking like:

• RX item 10.00
• contact stuff 14.99 (saved 2.50)
  
• Tide 5.99 (saved 3.00)
• toothpaste 5.99
• napkins 3.49
• paper plates 3.99
• tissues 1.99
• soap 7.99

Then the coupons!

• -1.00
• -1.00
• -3.00
• -10.00 (I only used the one CVS coupon, decided to save the $8 one for another purchase, it was good through the end of August)

Total, after sales tax = $40.76, saving $20.50!!!!!!!!

It was like getting my prescription, the tissues, and the soap for free, lol. I LOVE when I do stuff like this. I'm such a dork, that's why I had to share with you all. I'm also proud of myself for no impulse purchases, like a magazine or some gum or whatever. And the best part, I got another coupon for another $2 off a future purchase. Score!

Thank you Lauren!

Lauren is a student at my mom's school, who recently graduated and is moving up to our town's intermediate school. She'd been with my mom from Kindergarten to fourth grade, and was diagnosed with diabetes the summer before Kindergarten. Everyone was nervous, especially since Lauren was using a pump. My mom had dealt with other diabetic students before, but only ones who used insulin injections. (My mom is a school nurse, btw.) They had a great 5 years together, my mom took excellent care of Lauren and Lauren's diabetes is now almost an afterthought for her and her family. The family always gave my mom really super gifts for Nurse's Day, end of school, the holidays, etc. but this year's final gift really takes the cake.

To thank my mom for all of her hard work, patience and love over the past few years, Lauren's parents gave my mom a PANDORA BRACELET with three charms. There's a story behind all of them, I won't go into it here. What I'm most pleased about is that my mom's birthday is in a week, and I had no idea what to get her.

Hello jewelry store! Please show me your charms! Thank you Lauren and your parents! I now have birthday, Mother's Day and Christmas ideas for the next few years! (My mom would never buy the charms and accessories for herself, haha.)

I think I am the only person in the world...

Besides KC Jayhawk (hi!), who doesn't really care that Michael Jackson died. (and here I am blogging about it, haha)

Go ahead, flame me, smite me, I don't care.

I'm not surprised--I didn't think he was that stable of an individual to begin with, and I never imagined him getting old.

Yes, it is sad that a human being died relatively young, leaving behind three young kids. But that's all that I care about, really.

I was never a fan--oh sure, his music is catchy but I wasn't obsessed with him. I can't identify certain life moments with his songs. The only thing I do remember is being a little kid and not getting how a girl could be named "Billy Gene" (that's how I thought of it in my under 5 yr old mind) and why it mattered that "the kid is not my son."

Then again I didn't grow up in a super musical household--parents didn't buy records or tapes and weren't obsessed with music the way I am now.

really really irritated

and I can't even begin to explain why...

UGH.

This is a great post.

In light of some things I've thought about myself in the past, and some things I've learned over the weekend...

http://www.blogher.com/childless-women-do-not-lack-essential-humanity

In short, you can't judge a group of people.

ETA: For clarification's sake, I don't agree with the original article, not at all. I agree with the author of the blogher post.

Hello and goodbye...

Just popping into say hi, and that I'll be gone for a few days. Going to NYC to BookExpo America. Lots of busy-ness and business to take care of!

http://www.bookexpoamerica.com/

A few things to share.

1. My weight is lower than it's been in a long time. I won't give exact numbers, but I've lost almost 10 lbs since my last doctor's appointment. I'm hoping to be at 15 by the time I see her in May.

2. Final exam tonight!!! I'm actually excited, because it means class is O-V-E-R!

3. Tomorrow I get to go on a field trip for work--professional conference.

4. DH has a 2nd interview today, for a company that he really liked. Let's hope they really like him.

5. Ms. M and I are hanging out on Sunday!

one more, real quick...

Talk about me and the Irish goodbyes (I'm 1/4 Irish, I can say that!)....

I just got an image for myself, and it's a rabbit "done" in the style of the LOLcats at http://icanhascheezburger.com/.

I love the LOLcats and I love rabbits and I love message boards. One might even say I'm rabbit-like. That image/name/whatever has followed me throughout life. (Oooh, a future post!)

So I figured this picture would be most fitting for me and my blog. Yay!

Still here

Just very very very very very very very very very very very very busy these days, what with the semester wrapping up, work starting new projects, nice weather finally here and not wanting to be on the computer as much, etc.

Hope you're all doing well!

BTW, read Little Bee by Chris Cleave. SOOOOOOOOOOOO good.

SOOOO not getting much accomplished today...

And it's only Thursday. A few things to note:

1. I gained 2 lbs in a few days. Apparently that's what happens when you eat a TON of junk in a short time period. *roll eyes* I know this because my mom gave me a digital scale that she no longer wanted. Scales can drive you nuts! Part of me is glad that I now have one, and can keep VERY close tabs on my weight loss.

2. Annotated bibliography. Completed, printed, submitted. Now to start the "meat and potatoes" of the paper.

3. I have to work tomorrow, even though most people have it off. Not such a Good Friday, ha.

4. I broke my personal code of ethics and went to Facebook at work. I'm such a punk.

5. Tonight, DH and I are going to a laundromat because we are SICK and TIRED of our crazy laundry room at the condo complex. We are going out to eat too, so bonus!

6. My hair. I know you were waiting on that. I am going strong with the BS and ACV, and have started washing every other day. My hair looks BEST when I don't blow dry it (strange, I know) and it looks pretty good on the 2nd day of no washing. So going "no poo" can/does work! I'm pretty proud of myself for being able to do this.

7. Confession time. I have the fever. Most of you ladies should know what this means ;-) And those of you having babies now are NOT helping!!! LOL At least none of you live close by...or maybe that would help cool me off. Anyway, that's not going to happen because 1) DH needs a job (yes, still...and yes, I know it's been over a year) and 2) I have strict instructions from my endocrinologist NOT to even THINK about a baby until I'm healthier. So that's that. If anything, I'm more motivated to get into better shape.

Here's a pretty flower for y'all...almost time to go home!

Happy birthday to my favorite children's book...

The Very Hungry Caterpillar, by Eric Carle, is FORTY!

Best. book. ever.

I made my parents read it over and over and over and over again.

I give it to all of my friends when they have babies.

How could you NOT love the colors, the design, the story?


Look what Google did with their logo today:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/5021384/Google-celebrates-Eric-Carles-Very-Hungry-Caterpillar.html

Another story about the day:
http://www.mediabistro.com/unbeige/news/the_very_hungry_caterpillar_turns_40_111906.asp

And you get a picture, too!

Why GirlWednesday?

To answer that question (I had a few recently), we must go back...to the beginning!

http://girlwednesday29.blogspot.com/2008/03/welcome-to-my-blog.html

ETA: Wow, I've been blogging for one year and two days now!!! Happy anniversary to me! And to you readers :-)

Duuuuurrrrr

I figured out why I'm posting more these days.

Work unblocked all of Blogger's functions, so of course I'm free to post!

Before, I could read blogs, but couldn't leave comments...and definitely could not log into my own.

one more thing

I forgot to announce this:

I finally started using my KitchenAid mixer!!!! Works wonders for making cookies!!!!!

GO ME! lol

I think I am one of the working poor.

And it sucks. I really think the middle class is now the working poor. Or something. I might be over-dramatizing this, but sheesh.

I make an "OK" salary I guess (a little over $37K), but I wish I was paid more. I know, we all wish that. I dunno, I just feel like I worked hard throughout my life and went to a great school and all of that. Maybe this is a little bit of the entitlement monster sneaking out? When I started at my current job 2 years ago, I started out at $28K, so I guess increasing my salary by 9K in 2 yrs is pretty good? I don't know much about these things--salaries, getting paid what you should be getting, etc.

What bothers me mostly is after health insurance comes out, and taxes, and the bills are paid, there is very little for savings or fun/leisure. So I spend my free time doing things like cleaning and laundry and all of that...and then I stress because I never have any time for exploring my hobbies or interests. Or hell, even just sitting at the kitchen table staring into space.

Wait, I'm writing this blog entry, so it's not like I live a life of complete drudgery, lol.

And we have no debt, or crazy bills to pay--this is important to remember. But still, I just feel that things that could make my life easier are not possible. That we'll never be ahead, and I'll just go from work to chores at home and back to work.

Our bills are pretty straightforward, too:

• rent
• phone/cell/internet
• electric (which includes heat)
• cable (we have a pretty cheap plan, too...not the cheapest, though, ha)
  
• gym memberships
• food
• gas
• the random things needed at Target, Walmart, CVS
  
• copays for dr's visits and RX's
  
• and then the bills that come every so often, like car taxes or car insurance

I am happy that I don't have to write things like: student loans or credit card X, Y, AND Z...but it would be nice to have more to show for me doing "the right thing" you know?

I have thought about going back to school...because a lot of times you have to go back to school to earn more money...but I'm not sure what I'd go back for, nor am I sure that it would equal more money. Unless I changed fields 100% and you never know if you'll have to start out at a super low salary. I don't want to go backwards!!!!

In a perfect world, I'd love to have a cleaning person and a laundry person...then I could spend my free time doing FUN things! There is no perfect world though.

I think I'd feel better if this apartment were a bit bigger or if we didn't have so much stuff and few places to put it all...maybe I'd feel a bit more proactive about taking care of our space, or that it wouldn't look so packed. I'm actually embarrassed to have people over, because we have things everywhere...there's no place to put them all. Wedding gifts in the kitchen still, fishing rods in the half bath so the cats won't get to them, snow shovels by the door....argh!

religion stuff...

I'm not one to talk a lot about my faith. It's just something I keep pretty private, not because I'm ashamed or anything. It's always been something I've kept to myself. Even going to a Catholic college, lol.

Part of it does have to do with the fact that I know not everyone is Catholic...and not everyone is religious! Part of it is me not wanting to look like some Bible thumper or that I'm perfect/better than everyone else...because I certainly am not. I don't know, it's just one of those things I don't discuss. DH and I talk about it, that's a given. In my mind, it's important for spouses to be able to share these things. We aren't the people who pray before meals at restaurants (but if you do that, more power to ya!)--we are private.

Anyway, years ago, when DH was recovering from his accident, he prayed to St. Michael the Archangel a LOT, for support and strength. St. Michael is often portrayed as a warrior--he does look pretty cool. When it came time to choose a wedding date, we chose September 29. I was doing some random research before we got married and I found out that our wedding date is St. Michael's feast day in the Roman rite. Pretty interesting! But in DH's rite (he's Byzantine Catholic) St. Michael's feast day is November 8. So that's why we were at church twice in a weekend.

There have been some other weird coincidences with St. Michael. 1) DH was going to be a cop before his accident, and he's the patron saint of police officers. 2) He's also the patron saint of the sick--and DH was pretty badly injured.

If we are lucky to have a son, we have a name picked out...and yes, the middle name will be Michael.

Facebook stuff

SO WEIRD. And such a small world.

Shortly after I joined FB, I saw that one of my coworkers had a friend who looked like a guy I used to work with. Sure enough, it was the same guy...and they are cousins.

I got a notification today that this same coworker has a new friend...and the name looked familiar. So I check that guy's profile out. It's the ex-boyfriend of a former friend of mine. Too weird. The coworker and the ex-boyfriend grew up in the same town, so it's pretty easy to figure out how they know each other.

This ex-boyfriend guy is also friends with a girl with whom I went to HS!!!!! Now I'm wondering, how do the two of them know each other??? Crazy!

Another FB friend of mine...her husband knows two people with whom I went to HS...one guy through some internet thing they did back in the early days of internetting, and the girl through a mutual friend. WEIRD!

consideration

I am not a perfect person. Sometimes I'm snarky, even bitchy. But I do have a good heart, somewhere deep down there, and I try to do good things.

Two things happened to me and DH today that left me shaking my head...mostly at the lack of consideration on the parts of others.

1) I HATE it when people do NOT come get their sh*t out of the washers or dryers. DH was talking to me earlier (on the phone) and when we hung up, he was like,"oh gotta go put the stuff in the dryer." Later on, he signed on IM and was like, "so the laundry? Not in the dryers yet b/c some f*cker's stuff is STILL in there...it's been over TWO HOURS." So I asked him if the stuff was still warm, he said no. I told him, "OK, I'm gonna be the laundry room nazi now...they didn't get their stuff and it's cooled off, so it's been LONG enough. Take it out, put it on top of the dryer or on that little table." SERIOUSLY! Don't do laundry if you don't have time/can't remember to come get it or switch it around. Other people have to do their laundry too. There are 4 of each machine in the laundry room and all 4 dryers were full of someone's sh*t. Four years of college and I never dealt with such a horrible laundry situation as this, adults, living in condos. GRRR. 2) Late invitations. Today is Wednesday. We just got an invite, TODAY, in the MAIL, for a party on Saturday night. Not a "hey come over for some beer and pizza" party...someone's after the wedding, wedding reception. At a country club. WTF???? Could you give us some notice? DH needs to get his hair cut, he doesn't really have anything to wear (neither do I but I'll throw something together), we have to get a gift. ARGH!!!! This is DH's lawyer, who helped out IMMENSELY with his lawsuit. If it weren't for that, and for the fact that his and his now-wife came to our wedding, we would SOOOO not be going. Please, people, be considerate!!!!!