unemployment makes us distant

Over the past year and almost-two-months that DH has been laid off, we don't go as many places or talk to as many people anymore.

It's not really the money, since it doesn't cost much to pick up the phone or send an email.

It's the...uncomfortable feelings that come with dealing with well-intentioned family and friends.

The questions.

The things that are left unsaid.

I don't want to deal with the people--their questions, their thoughts. So I don't.

I know I have isolated myself.

Having a long-term unemployment makes me feel very isolated, personally. I don't feel like there's much I can contribute to conversations. I'm not buying a house, I'm not getting a puppy, I'm not getting married, I'm not going on vacation this summer. I don't think many people are doing all of these things, but there are very few things to look forward to right now. I'm just sad a lot of the time. 14 months is a long time to have to deal with something that you want to change, but have no control over.

Additionally, not many people understand how DH and I feel right now. That sounds silly when the unemployment rate is so high, but for the people we know, we're the "oddity." So everyone just smiles and tells us how sorry they are...but no one knows how to help. Can we be helped? Who knows. It's almost patronizing, like we're two little kids who lost their puppy.

I want to look forward to something, but that thing is not guaranteed. Why dare to hope if it might not happen?

What do we do then? I still have a job, yes, but it's hard to enjoy it or feel proud of my work when I know my husband feels so badly about his working situation. I'm working on my masters, but my husband already has his and hasn't brought him anywhere in his career.

Is it really worth it for me to keep doing what I'm doing? I wish someone had an answer for me, to make it easier for me, and for DH, too.