So...WTF?

WTF. Grrr, I need to get to the gym more. I went to the doctor today, for just a normal endocrinologist check up. Weight is up again. 5 lbs since my last appointment in January.

I say it again. W T F ????

I've always been a bigger person, even when I was a little kid. No matter what I ate, what exercises I did, I was always chubby, fat, bigger, etc. There's never been a time where I was successful with long term weight loss.

What I don't get is why I still continue to gain weight, even when I'm really not eating THAT much differently than usual. I don't know...maybe it's my age? They do say things slow down the older you get. Ugh, how irritating. I also have PCOS which makes it harder for my body to shed weight, but there are women out there who've managed to lose weight while battling PCOS. I don't know what to do anymore.

Maybe I really AM eating differently and just didn't think so? I dunno. There are some days where I "overindulge" and that's probably where the weight gain is coming from.

My doctor is worried, I'm worried. Everyone is worried. Part of it is mental/psychological, and part of it is just "me." I just wish it was like a switch, and I could shut it off and lose the weight permanently.

I am going to end this update now because it just gets me upset.